What To Do When You’ve Lost a Fight

One thing I believe I inherited from my dad is this intense need for good guys to win in the movie. I mean INTENSE. When I was 12 years old, my brother and I went to see the movie Richie Rich, and when the bad guys were chasing after Richie, I remember my dad cheering and shouting in the movie theater for the demise of the bad guys! Man, my brother and I were so embarrassed. But he didn’t care. He wanted to see the good guy win.

It seems almost natural to see good overcome evil. We want to see the hero trample his opponent, walk away with the girl, receive applause from the whole city and fly off in the night waiting for the next bad guy to surface.

But….here’s me keeping it One Hundred with you! Even Superman got his A$$ kicked. I’ve been a superman fan since birth. And you have no idea how infuriated I was when they laid superman in that coffin after his death after a fight with Batman.

Truth is, I think the death of Superman is relatable for many men today. I’m talking about the men that wake up every morning. They go hard to build futures for themselves, build homes for their wives and to feed their kids. So many of us push when we tired, keep moving when we’re in pain. Men who are fathers, providers, givers and demonstrate this tenacity that will not allow us to quit even when circumstances have backed us up against walls and into corners.

There are men who can relate, who made wrong moves and wrong decisions and now have no idea how to bounce back, rebuild and regain their footing. But they have given so much for the sake of others. The sacrifices that some of these men out here make are far greater than some of our greatest superheroes make in movies.

No one knows that they are heroes but they are. Mental fights, Spiritual warfare, internal bouts, the fight to walk a steady path, the battle with believing in themselves, the pain that comes with losing love and those who were close. The battle with not being accepted because you aren’t like everyone else.

Now that I think about it, Superman may have been a white man on the screen but he represented for the Brothers! As a matter of fact, having Michael B Jordan be our black superman doesn’t even matter that much because I can look at many of the brothers I do life with everyday and see black superman’s all around me.

Shout out to two Superman’s we’ve lost very recently in the last week

(RIP Wendell Zeiglar & My Uncle RIP Rickey Dixon)Superman Coffin

What I’m saying is, you have to be prepared to take some losses. To win every fight is a fairy tale. To achieve every goal with having a journey full of setbacks is not the way life is set up.

Here are a few things to do when you lose a fight:

  1. Own the Loss – This allows evaluation of your actions during the fight to see where the weaknesses were in your strategy or your plan and how to eliminate mistakes.
  2. Deal with Your Emotions – It dangerous to suppress them. Recognize how you feel and refuse to allow your emotions to paralyze your passion. Emotions are necessary for evaluation and improvement in regard to how we see ourselves and how we see others. If God didn’t want us to use our emotions, we wouldn’t have them.
  3. Talk to someone who has been where you are trying to go because I will bet you, they have dealt with the same doubts of coming back from a loss.
  4. Don’t allow your loss to define you. It could have been a matter of a missed step in your planning, a skill you need fine tune, finding the right connection to network with and be your strength in an area. Imperfection is a matter of humanness not a matter of malfunction.
  5. Don’t Give up! Don’t give up on your dreams! Don’t give up on your plan! Don’t give up on yourself!

You have got to get back up! Too many people need you to stand up and move on because what you will accomplish will open up doors for many to follow. Your victory is in your ability to maintain Hope and move in Faith

Hope Builds Legacy,

Aquila T Carmon

The Fight is On(Money Matters)

So you’ve decide you’re getting your money together, improving your credit and getting your finances on track! You are SICK of being “broke, busted and disgusted”! What now?

You pick up extra shifts, work a second job! Try to increase your income and decrease your expenses.

But…..3 months later and you still need money at the end of the month. Let me tell you something… when you get in the boxing ring with Benjamin “the money game” Loot, you’d better know you’re getting in the ring with a knockout King.

Let me give you a few tips for the fight.

1. Tracking finances after you’ve spent them is an amazing way to see how you can spend more wisely. Setting a budget however will help guide you in wise spending because you see where the money NEEDS to go vs just where you WANTED it to go! These must be done in conjunction with one another.

2. You will get frustrated! Oh yes! Money is touchy and can easily reach our emotions. Especially when the budget tells you to rent a red box movie and grab a box of Orville Redenbacher instead of hanging out with the crowd of people that believe they have “money to waste”!

Facing how much debt you have, money conversations with your spouse and trying to figure out how to pay some things off is mentally draining but incredibly rewarding.

3. That being said, make a full commitment that you are going to change where you are financially, fully understanding that you will make mistakes along the way. Be patient with yourself understanding that reaching financial wellness is a process!

4. Celebrate every single win! Take a breather and reflect on each one. Then get started on the next win!

You got this!!

Aquila T Carmon

Can I Get a Witness

Matthew 10:32-42

1. Being an effective Witness first means we must Confess Jesus! Confession refers to Acknowledgement and Covenant. We aren’t just talking about Jesus in passing or by nonchalant mention of His Great name but to make it known that Jesus is a part of our lives. It is demonstration and expression of him in conversation and in action.  

I remember when I used to smoke and cuss but when my father came in the room people saw a different, better behaved me because my dad was present. So it is when Jesus is present in the heart and mind of a believer and not Jesus at certain times but at all times. We must acknowledge and present ourselves as His, as followers, as believers, as people who have been touched and changed by the grace of God. 

Jesus is teaching the disciples in Matthew 10 to “confess me before men” meaning in front of them, openly and without shame!  In other words…stand up for me and my name. We can not be intimidated by people who do not believe and refuse to follow Christ. 

God promises in turn that he will confess us before His Father. We would stand before God and Jesus will vouch for us. 

To be a witness you will have to confess Christ in front of the masses and never bow to someone else’s ideals about faith or the lack of faith. You must have an objective view of your faith meaning you can’t even be spinned around by the opinions of others or your own opinion or feelings at times but stand wholly on the truth of God’s Word. 

2. Your commitment to Christ must be greater than your commitment to the people you love.

One of the greatest tests of faith will be your willingness to follow Jesus even if it means being alone.  How much more do you desire to do God’s will than your desire to be in relationship with people? 

A commitment to Jesus requires you to let go of reputation, popularity and comfortability. It requires you to embrace discipline, rejection and sacrifice .  

-The ministry of Jesus began with 40 days of Jesus bringing his flesh into discipline.

– The ministry of Jesus endure Rejection of Jesus teaching and his claim to be the Son of God

-The ministry of Jesus and all that he did would have meant nothing had he not been willing to give up his life and his life become the atonement for our sins. 

Jesus said if you’re not ready to love me more than you love them or love me more than you love it then you are not worthy of me. 

3. Giving up who we think we should be for the sake of Jesus being the glory in our life is the way that we gain our life

It is a difficult task but one that takes a made up mind to put our own image or ourselves away and seek after who God has called us to be. The life of Jesus is a clear demonstration that our purpose can not be fulfilled without self-sacrifice. In all that we do, we must do it to the Glory of God and for no other reason. 

Are you a Witness? 

I’d love to chat with you about this. Leave a comment below and share this thought with somebody you know! 

Aquila T Carmon 

Short Distance Champion

One of the keys to success is successful planning and strategic goal setting. Jim Rohn, an American writer and successful entrepreneur, would teach people aspiring to succeed to plan your day, week, month and year.

This can be a challenge in our super busy lives but it truly is one of the challenges that gives us a leg up and positions us to reach our goals.

Why is that? Have you ever met an marksman that became an expert at firing his weapon without a target to aim at? Of Course not. Hitting the mark in everyday life is no different!

We have to work to become “Short Distance Champions” before we can ever achieve the Long distance goals. If you meet daily goals you can meet the weekly goals that align with those daily goals.

Today set your goals for the day and the week. Take the time this week to identify your goals for the month, then set them in three month increments until you’ve set them for the year.

A great thing to remember is that missed goals still stretched you to make progress especially if you have focused on Championing those short distance goals.

As always, Don’t you lose hope!

Aquila T Carmon

A Thing Called Perception

perception+

So for the first time in years I completely cleaned out all five of my emails! It’s amazing what you find when you clean up all the clutter and boy did I find something good!!

A story my brother emailed to me six years ago about a little old lady who was still driving at the age of 80! It is hilarious and profound at the same time. The story speaks to the power of perception. The way your mind comprehends a situation, opinion or problem could determine what fuels, motivates and encourages you.

This little lady had the right perception. Take a peak!!

*Grandma’s Letter

*She is eighty-eight years old and still drives her own car.

*She writes: *

*Dear Granddaughter, *

*The other day I went up to our local Christian book store and saw a

Honk if you love Jesus bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy

that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting. *

*So, I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper. *

*Boy, am I glad I did, what an uplifting experience that followed. *

*I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in

thought about the Lord and how good he is, and I didn’t notice that the light had changed. *

*It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn’t honked, I’d never have noticed. *

*I found that lots of people love Jesus! *

*While I was sitting there, the guy behind started honking like crazy, and then he leaned out of his window and screamed, *

*’For the love of God! ‘ *

*’Go! Go! Go! Jesus Christ, GO!’ *

*What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus! *

*Everyone started honking! *

*I just leaned out my window and started waving and smiling at all those loving people. *

*I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love! *

*There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a sunny beach. *

*I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. *

*I asked my young teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant. *

*He said it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something .. *

*Well, I have never met anyone from Hawaii , so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign right back. *

*My grandson burst out laughing. *

*Why even he was enjoying this religious experience!! *

*A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me. *

*I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed the light had changed. *

*So, I waved at all my brothers and sisters grinning, and drove on through the intersection.

*I noticed that I was the only car that got through the intersection before the light changed again and felt kind of sad that I had to leave them after all the love we had shared. *

*So I slowed the car down, leaned out the window and gave them all the

Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away. *

*Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!!

* Will write again soon, *

* Love, Grandma *

I love it!! And I love this Grandma!!

Aquila T Carmon

What’s The Process?

I read this article this morning that read:

“The most effective leaders are those who develop processes to help their organization reach and stay on top. Habitual systems help people run at their peak without overexerting mental energy when moving into uncharted territories. However, without systems in place, people tend to fall back into their default setting, which can include bad habits. To be an effective leader, it’s important to acknowledge bad habits and replace them with healthier, long-lasting habits, creating a new default setting.”

I find this to be true in my household, my business, my workplace and church organization. Developing systems that work and are tailored for your specific goals can be tedious, even frustrating. On top of that, the processes may require developing new habits to practice. This same thing can be true for new relationships, marriage or bringing home the first kid from the delivery room. Systems can keep you on track and on pace. Systems can reduce stress and increase the effectiveness of your activity.

I encourage you to take some time to evaluate the processes you have in place or even areas where you may need to implement and develop new processes and work to be the most productive in all you do.

Aquila T Carmon

3 Things To Remember About Making Changes

3 Things to Remember when it’s time to take action as make big changes.

1. It will cost you in the beginning.

It will absolutely cost you! Money, time, energy and sacrifice will be inevitable in order to see progress and success. Taking action is not easy but it is necessary for self development. Positive action adds positive value via increase of knowledge, wisdom and experience.

2. If you don’t take action things will stay the same for you but continue changing around you.

If we are not willing to take action we are subjected to watching things change around us and nothing big ever changes for us. The risk in that, is experiencing how changes in our career, family and life will either slightly benefit us or cause damage forcing us to change anyway. Don’t wait to see what happens, make moves to create changes that will benefit you!

3. Everyone will not approve or agree.

It is absolutely ok that people won’t or don’t get what you are doing. It may be someone you expected to support you like a best friend or a spouse. But develop an “oh well” mindset. Oh well, thanks for listening. Oh Well, this is still something I have to do. Oh well, it’s risky and I might lose in the beginning or I know it’s going to cost me in the beginning but I’m going to do it anyway.

Aquila T Carmon