What To Do When You’ve Lost a Fight

One thing I believe I inherited from my dad is this intense need for good guys to win in the movie. I mean INTENSE. When I was 12 years old, my brother and I went to see the movie Richie Rich, and when the bad guys were chasing after Richie, I remember my dad cheering and shouting in the movie theater for the demise of the bad guys! Man, my brother and I were so embarrassed. But he didn’t care. He wanted to see the good guy win.

It seems almost natural to see good overcome evil. We want to see the hero trample his opponent, walk away with the girl, receive applause from the whole city and fly off in the night waiting for the next bad guy to surface.

But….here’s me keeping it One Hundred with you! Even Superman got his A$$ kicked. I’ve been a superman fan since birth. And you have no idea how infuriated I was when they laid superman in that coffin after his death after a fight with Batman.

Truth is, I think the death of Superman is relatable for many men today. I’m talking about the men that wake up every morning. They go hard to build futures for themselves, build homes for their wives and to feed their kids. So many of us push when we tired, keep moving when we’re in pain. Men who are fathers, providers, givers and demonstrate this tenacity that will not allow us to quit even when circumstances have backed us up against walls and into corners.

There are men who can relate, who made wrong moves and wrong decisions and now have no idea how to bounce back, rebuild and regain their footing. But they have given so much for the sake of others. The sacrifices that some of these men out here make are far greater than some of our greatest superheroes make in movies.

No one knows that they are heroes but they are. Mental fights, Spiritual warfare, internal bouts, the fight to walk a steady path, the battle with believing in themselves, the pain that comes with losing love and those who were close. The battle with not being accepted because you aren’t like everyone else.

Now that I think about it, Superman may have been a white man on the screen but he represented for the Brothers! As a matter of fact, having Michael B Jordan be our black superman doesn’t even matter that much because I can look at many of the brothers I do life with everyday and see black superman’s all around me.

Shout out to two Superman’s we’ve lost very recently in the last week

(RIP Wendell Zeiglar & My Uncle RIP Rickey Dixon)Superman Coffin

What I’m saying is, you have to be prepared to take some losses. To win every fight is a fairy tale. To achieve every goal with having a journey full of setbacks is not the way life is set up.

Here are a few things to do when you lose a fight:

  1. Own the Loss – This allows evaluation of your actions during the fight to see where the weaknesses were in your strategy or your plan and how to eliminate mistakes.
  2. Deal with Your Emotions – It dangerous to suppress them. Recognize how you feel and refuse to allow your emotions to paralyze your passion. Emotions are necessary for evaluation and improvement in regard to how we see ourselves and how we see others. If God didn’t want us to use our emotions, we wouldn’t have them.
  3. Talk to someone who has been where you are trying to go because I will bet you, they have dealt with the same doubts of coming back from a loss.
  4. Don’t allow your loss to define you. It could have been a matter of a missed step in your planning, a skill you need fine tune, finding the right connection to network with and be your strength in an area. Imperfection is a matter of humanness not a matter of malfunction.
  5. Don’t Give up! Don’t give up on your dreams! Don’t give up on your plan! Don’t give up on yourself!

You have got to get back up! Too many people need you to stand up and move on because what you will accomplish will open up doors for many to follow. Your victory is in your ability to maintain Hope and move in Faith

Hope Builds Legacy,

Aquila T Carmon

3 Things To Remember About Making Changes

3 Things to Remember when it’s time to take action as make big changes.

1. It will cost you in the beginning.

It will absolutely cost you! Money, time, energy and sacrifice will be inevitable in order to see progress and success. Taking action is not easy but it is necessary for self development. Positive action adds positive value via increase of knowledge, wisdom and experience.

2. If you don’t take action things will stay the same for you but continue changing around you.

If we are not willing to take action we are subjected to watching things change around us and nothing big ever changes for us. The risk in that, is experiencing how changes in our career, family and life will either slightly benefit us or cause damage forcing us to change anyway. Don’t wait to see what happens, make moves to create changes that will benefit you!

3. Everyone will not approve or agree.

It is absolutely ok that people won’t or don’t get what you are doing. It may be someone you expected to support you like a best friend or a spouse. But develop an “oh well” mindset. Oh well, thanks for listening. Oh Well, this is still something I have to do. Oh well, it’s risky and I might lose in the beginning or I know it’s going to cost me in the beginning but I’m going to do it anyway.

Aquila T Carmon

A Measure of Faith

What does it mean that God has dealt to every man the measure of faith? Pondering this causes me to ask questions like….How much faith did He give me? How does it compare to the faith of others? Will this faith only get me so far vs the faith of great leaders?
Romans 12:3 says:
“For I say to every man that is among you, through the grace given unto me, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.
Let’s be honest for a moment. Walking by faith is scary when you don’t seem to have the faith it takes but at the same time it takes faith to accomplish what we are called to.  It takes faith to walk into ICU and believe God will heal sickness.  It takes faith the bury our closest loved ones and believe God will give us the grace to keep going. It takes faith to encourage someone that it will work out. It takes faith to look into the eyes of a parent who lost their child and believe God will strengthen them.
It takes faith to make marriage work, start a business, serve with people who often disagree with you, maintain beneficial relationships and to raise children against the waves of negativity, darkness, distraction and disaster that crashes into our minds every single day. It takes faith to know that you can be who God created you to be. 
What did he create you to be? Powerful beyond the strength of your enemies. Wisely armed with the Mind of Christ. Unstoppable with the force of the Holy Spirit working in you day by day, leading you to and through victories great and small.
So the measure of faith that we are given is a tailored, measured, calculated portion of faith that is meant to work in and through you actively assisting you to your predestined call.  You Measure of faith is directly proportional to who God, as a man, measured you up to be. It is not to be compared and it is not to be doubted. It is an activator that will drive you into prayer and then into action. If you were a vehicle, this measure of faith is premium gasoline, high grade oil, fluids and regular maintenance for you life. If you have the faith to believe enough in yourself and believe enough in God then you will see that all things are possible.
“Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things unseen” Hebrews 11:1 Your measure of faith is only meant for what God intended to achieve in you and through you. So don’t just keep the faith, Use the Faith!
Bless you,
Aquila T Carmon

The Necessity of Change – Introduction

I woke up on Sunday Morning and my son busted into my room, his little wet body shivering, wrapped in a towel saying, “daddy where are my clothes.” I woke up from my sleep as I heard the door open and half way surprised asked him, “Did you already take a shower?” He replies “Yes I did”! Both of us were proud as I told him “Awesome…Now go back downstairs and find some underwear!”

Wow….only six years ago I was changing pampers on him and his twin brother. Most of us do this but when did you last think about how much time changes things? Seasons are in and out seemingly faster as we age, almost as if seconds tic faster on the clock nowadays.

Time isn’t waiting for you is it? Nope, so what are you waiting for. Opportunity is not only telling you to find it but opportunities are searching for you.  Open your eyes and see the chance to do something you haven’t done yet. Change!

For too long, our days become so routine and predictable that we could feel the need to change in our heart, soul, even in our bones. Change is calling us out! When we feel there has to be more, like we have to do better and begin to sense there is more for than this, guess what. There is! This feeling of unsettling means we have now engaged with the necessity change.

Why? Because purpose and destiny are on the line! Who you become, who you are becoming, depends on the steps you are taking to improve, develop, build, learn and grow. You don’t have time to waste or to procrastinate. The Almighty Phrase “I’ll do it tomorrow” or “I’ll start on Monday” is a life snooze that will put you late for your appointment with purpose. Don’t WAIT!

Start the business, ask her to marry you, set up the budget, get your Credit fixed, go to the beach, read the book, take the classes, apply for the grant, build the church, move to the other state, MAKE A POWER MOVE and watch God be faithful when you act in faith!!

Aquila T Carmon

5 Principles of Progress

There are quite a few principles that drive us in the direction of progress and success in our lives. It’s wise to reflect and see if we are putting those principles in place. Today I’ll share five of those values with you that caused a huge difference in my life and catapulted me from literally a place of depression and distraction to determination and desire for greater achievement. These principles are relevant for spiritual, financial, career and personal growth. Let’s jump into it.

The first one is PRAYER. What is one of the secrets of having great focus? Having direction! Having a really good sense of destination sets our sails on course for an amazing and purposeful journey. Like any journey though, Inevitably,  we get lost or sometimes even lose ourselves. Prayer brings us back to a proper head-space, heart-place.  Prayer keep us grounded and in connection with God. Praying for God’s guidance, strength and peace essentially aligns us with God’s will through our convictions, His grace and gives us clarity even through the clouded and crowded times. Jesus spent hours praying because He understood that not only external but also his internal needs came from a Spiritual source, His Father in Heaven. It is wise to consult with the Lord about where we are headed and what we should accomplish before consulting with men.  God knows the ultimate purpose for our lives and there could be unnecessary frustration when we allow our intentions to supersede God’s divine direction for our life.

The second is PERSPECTIVE.  How do you see where you are? We should see our challenges like a weight lifter sees a weight that is too heavy and consider how we will build up to clearing that weight. Problems can make us better problem solvers, trouble can build patience, tragedy can push us closer to our Source of strength, pain builds our ability to endure greater pains, hurt and broken trust wises us up. You get the idea. Don’t see a wall as a wall, but a teaching objective that will force you to reach, stretch and think more critically or trust God more consistently.  See your problems from the perspective of every problem has a solution. Remember that God will never put more on you than you can bear.

Next is PLANNING. Yes, strategy is vital in this game of life. I hear you….” Things never go as planned” I’ll say that is True and False. The wrong perspective may tell you this, simply because the whole plan didn’t go as planned. Get this. If you create a plan to meet your goals and only 10% of your plan worked out, then the plan is working because the plan was really to make progress.  A plan is a safeguard. It’s like putting the bumper rails up at the bowling alley to keep you from rolling a gutter ball. Planning may not get you a strike, but it should at least help get you some points on the scorecard.

Fourth is PERSEVERANCE. The ability to move forward when you are ready to quit. Perseverance is the internal characteristic that you can train yourself to put in action. Deciding to walk when you cannot run, crawl when you cannot walk and stopping only to catch your breath, to re-strategize, to pray, to reflect on your perspective but never stopping because you quit.

Lastly to Acknowledge and Celebrate PROGRESS. Seeing and realizing that even though this was small progress that this is a BIG moment. If your plan in laid out and you have made progress toward that goal, then you must realize within every goal is the goal of making progress. If your church didn’t grow by 20 members but it grew by five, celebrate the progress. If your business income didn’t grow by $5,000 but it grew by $1,000, celebrate the progress.

Remember that “The race is not given to the swift but to those who endure to the end.” Your life doesn’t need to be in competition with anyone else. So, kill all those comparisons and work towards your goals. Stay focused, stay positive, plan every aspect of your life and Celebrate along the way.

There is Hope,

Aquila T Carmon

The Grace Place

One of the first things that really attracted me to God was the opportunity to bring my life to him while I stood in a state of hopelessness and in a condition that others would not accept me in. It attracted me to him because even though I had sung all my life about amazing grace it isn’t until you really need it and try it that you realize wow, this grace of God’s really is amazing.

When I gave my life to God sixteen years ago, I was broken, hurt, broken-hearted, failed everything I’d tried at life so far. I had just lost my job, my license, car broke down, with drugs parading around in my system and the first three things all happened in one day. I was in a hard place, a place of depression, desperation and decision.

I needed something, someone or both. Honestly, I had no friend that was able to deal with the weight of my heart, thoughts or emotions. Even If they did understand, people don’t really have what you need when your life seems to be a walking tragedy. I’ve always found it to be a true statement that it is difficult to find mercy with people. Whether it be the mercy that will urge giving or the mercy that allow forgiving. Truly, what’s needed when waves are crashing into our ship while sailing in deep waters is God and His grace.

Ah, Grace, unmerited favor, mercy, compassion and acceptance that can be shown but not even noticed. I wonder if you’ve ever missed the opportunity to thank God for grace because you didn’t see it. Many of us think that grace is just for the saints, covering us as we make mistakes. But listen, grace is so much more. God uses grace as a means to influence, lead, change and alter the condition and direction of our hearts. Grace is a heart influencer that chases us down and finds us when we are lost. The Word of God says that grace “bounds towards me.” Yes, it finds us in times of need, justifies us and “through grace we are saved” by faith. Ephesians 2:8

I’ve found during my walk with Christ there are 3 places God’s grace meets us. Not the only 3 places but the ones I’d like to share with you today.

The First place we meet God’s grace is in A Place of Sacrifice. A place where we make it no longer about us but like David in Psalm 51:10 simply desire a clean heart. The sacrifice where we realize our desires may be of flesh and not spirit, so we then seek after God’s righteousness and abandon our own selfish agendas. Oswald chambers wrote “purity in God’s children is not the outcome of obedience to His law but the result of the spiritual work of His grace.” We become righteous by giving God full permission to work in us and work those things out of us that are not like him, without resistance to his leading. We render our whole man to God’s hand

The Second place we meet God’s grace is in A Place of Humility. A place where we recognize we’re willing to go but we must openly admit to God that we are just not brave enough or strong enough. It’s the place in the process where we love God and want to do his will, but we fail at holiness because we cannot obtain the mark without His supernatural strength working inside of us. We openly admit that it is not us but Him and that His Holy Spirit is not only the prerequisite but the absolute necessity to obtain any true level of relevant success in this life. This is where grace doesn’t just cover our sins and cleanse our heart, but grace works as an element of force, as much as we will allow it, to turn our hearts back to God or fully towards Him.

The Third place we meet God’s grace Is in A Place of Victory. 2 Corinthians 9:8 “And God is able to make all grace abound toward you; that you, always having all suffiency in all things, may abound to every good work.” Suffiency literally means a perfect condition of life in which no aid or support is needed. This is not to say you don’t need help but to say that here is the grace and with this grace comes all of the help you need!

In times of need, desperation, loneliness, confusion, despair, brokenness, grace abounding moves mountains, tares down walls, lights up darkness and crushes every enemy just to get to where you are.

Amazing grace how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me. How did it find me in all of this mess? It does not matter what stands between you and God when you have decided to accept Jesus into your life then God sends Grace abounding towards like a train without brakes just to deliver you right where you stand.

Know today that God has a meeting room for you. It is called A Grace Place. And this Grace Place could be your living room, your dorm room or your workplace restroom. It is the place that you make the decision to accept Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Savior.

There is Hope,God Bless You!
Aquila T Carmon